Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
