I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
