got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize