Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
