I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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