thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize