and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Randomize
