Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize