at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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