I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Randomize
