just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
