I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
