im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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