i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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