I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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