lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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