I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
