I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize