How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
