Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity