I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...