You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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