You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
