Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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