Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
