i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
So many bounce houses so little time
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
