I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
