the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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