I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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