Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize