I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You need Xanax blowdarts
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize