5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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