We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
