you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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