So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
