She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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