Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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