i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Dick very happy bro
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
