Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Randomize