I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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