Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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