i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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