I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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