its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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