i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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