ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
