Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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