I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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