All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize