Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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