Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
